![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
lemonbellaThese are a bit late and short because I've had to spend my entire Sunday designing a training course on the Deprivation of Liberty Safeguards to the Mental Capacity Act (2005) Sadly, this means I am more equipped to comment on those than Neil McKenzie's trousers.
Herschelle 7
It will be fine. Herschelle will be fine. I am remaining calm as instructed. He gets 7 for sitting in a plastic chair and looking relaxed.
Imaginary Graeme 265
Imaginary Graeme spent much of this match trying to eat pizza with his toes. It was a bit messy and his pizza tasted funny, so he's not doing that again.
Amla 5
It says a lot about how much of this match I actually saw that I scored Hashim Amla and only realised he didn't play when I counted up how many people there were in the list. Anyway, here's what I said about the Hashim Amla I thought was playing:
Not entirely sure why Duminy isn’t opening, but Hashim Amla is Hashim Amla, so he can carry on being generally affable and not score many runs if he likes.
So, it turns out that Hashim Amla can carry on being affable, not even be selected and he will still merit a score.
Kallis 3
Yes, I know he scored runs, but they were Kallisy runs which don’t count half as much as others. Also he smiled and was funny in the post match interview, which he knows annoys me.
de Villiers 7
I totally missed AB's innings and haven’t got to that bit of my video yet. I'm guessing it was good but he got himself out in a faintly embarrassing way. This is often a fair bet with AB. He gets an extra point if he fell over whilst doing it.
Duminy 6
He was only not excellent this time so that other people didn’t start to feel inferior. Still cool though, even in defeat.
McKenzie 7
Doesn't really deserve that for his batting or his fielding, but this is my rating system so he can have points for just being him.
Boucher 4
I don’t want to give Boucher low points, but he did not score fast enough at the end, and kept the strike away from the Older Morkel. Also, he should have sacrificed himself to the Duminy run out because Duminy was managing to get bat on ball.
He gets 5 because that's the first time I've judged anyone on their actual cricket this series, so he wasn't to know.
Older Morkel 6
He would have done the special batting thing if people hadn’t used up all the overs faffing about. They really need to be a bit more flexible with their batting order in these sorts of situations. Not as flexible as Kent though: I would like them to put more thought into it than "is anyone fully dressed yet?"
Trotsky 1
Put his arm around Herschelle. Graeme's thinking about investing in an electronic tag that gives him an electric shock whenever he touches one of the team or does something vaguely captainly.
Larger Morkel 4
There were no tall metaphors at all this match. The novelty must have finally worn off for the Australian commentators.
Steyn 9
Gets those points for getting covered in syrup in![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
indian_skimmer's and my discussion about South Africans and desserts.
Ntini 6
Dropped a catch, but sensibly stayed down pretending he was hurt so people didn't shout at him. He has points saved over from the last match where he spent time wrapped in a blue fluffy towel.
Herschelle 7
It will be fine. Herschelle will be fine. I am remaining calm as instructed. He gets 7 for sitting in a plastic chair and looking relaxed.
Imaginary Graeme 265
Imaginary Graeme spent much of this match trying to eat pizza with his toes. It was a bit messy and his pizza tasted funny, so he's not doing that again.
Amla 5
It says a lot about how much of this match I actually saw that I scored Hashim Amla and only realised he didn't play when I counted up how many people there were in the list. Anyway, here's what I said about the Hashim Amla I thought was playing:
Not entirely sure why Duminy isn’t opening, but Hashim Amla is Hashim Amla, so he can carry on being generally affable and not score many runs if he likes.
So, it turns out that Hashim Amla can carry on being affable, not even be selected and he will still merit a score.
Kallis 3
Yes, I know he scored runs, but they were Kallisy runs which don’t count half as much as others. Also he smiled and was funny in the post match interview, which he knows annoys me.
de Villiers 7
I totally missed AB's innings and haven’t got to that bit of my video yet. I'm guessing it was good but he got himself out in a faintly embarrassing way. This is often a fair bet with AB. He gets an extra point if he fell over whilst doing it.
Duminy 6
He was only not excellent this time so that other people didn’t start to feel inferior. Still cool though, even in defeat.
McKenzie 7
Doesn't really deserve that for his batting or his fielding, but this is my rating system so he can have points for just being him.
Boucher 4
I don’t want to give Boucher low points, but he did not score fast enough at the end, and kept the strike away from the Older Morkel. Also, he should have sacrificed himself to the Duminy run out because Duminy was managing to get bat on ball.
He gets 5 because that's the first time I've judged anyone on their actual cricket this series, so he wasn't to know.
Older Morkel 6
He would have done the special batting thing if people hadn’t used up all the overs faffing about. They really need to be a bit more flexible with their batting order in these sorts of situations. Not as flexible as Kent though: I would like them to put more thought into it than "is anyone fully dressed yet?"
Trotsky 1
Put his arm around Herschelle. Graeme's thinking about investing in an electronic tag that gives him an electric shock whenever he touches one of the team or does something vaguely captainly.
Larger Morkel 4
There were no tall metaphors at all this match. The novelty must have finally worn off for the Australian commentators.
Steyn 9
Gets those points for getting covered in syrup in
indian_skimmer's and my discussion about South Africans and desserts. Ntini 6
Dropped a catch, but sensibly stayed down pretending he was hurt so people didn't shout at him. He has points saved over from the last match where he spent time wrapped in a blue fluffy towel.
