I'm not crazy, I just have another conciousness in my brain

There's been a lot of talk about how the smaller teams shouldn't be playing the world cup. I have an alternative suggestion: I think we should stop Australia playing in all competitions.

They're always dull and predictable, they make me angry and they get Graeme Smith out (which only Matthew Hoggard should be allowed to do, the rest of the time Graeme should be allowed to do that thing where he stands still, whacks the ball to all parts and turns batting into a form a pornography).

Tournaments would be a whole lot more interesting and enjoyable without Australians.

I had a long rant about Flintoff's idiocy, but the Bob Woolmer thing overshadows it. However, I would like to thank Flintoff for proving me right about absolutely everything.

When you ruined my christmas, I was sensible and considerate and I took a little break and stopped yelling obscenities at you. I left you alone and gave you the time and space you obviously needed. Then you started winning during the matches I didn't watch, and I was grudgingly impressed from a distance.

Now, when I've steeled myself to watch again, dusted off my cricket patriotism and started to get excited, you're going to throw away wickets against New Zealand are you? That's really how it's going to be?

Bastards.