Twenty20 India v South Africa Live! (rather than via the TV)

[lemonbella]

Graeme 653

I saw Graeme runs. Graeme runs are *fantastic*. Also he gets 642 of those points for making a complete and utter hash of a high five with Morne Morkel. Maybe they should include that in their fielding drills.

He gets one point for standing in the middle all by himself for five minutes, trying not to look awkward, until other people came out to do the toss.

Also, he's clearly developed a system where any fielder who isn't sure where to stand must put both their arms in the air until Graeme points at them. That's organisation. Are we sure Graeme hasn’t trained as a primary school teacher in his spare time?

Kallis 3

Gets those for not playing. When he retires he'll get a 10.

Gibbs 13

The one shot Herschelle played was fantastic. Also, he made Graeme scamper. Graeme hasn’t had to scamper much with Kallis as is his opening partner. He gets most of those points for taking part in the senior player on-field discussions but ending them all with a shrug of his shoulders. And he gets the final three for eating a cookie with some juice.

AB 9

AB was excellent again. I obviously have good AB karma. He did a lot of pointing in the field, only to have Graeme undo the pointing a second later by making the fielder move back to where he started. It's the trying that's important.

He did lots of running around like an excitable puppy, as I have come to expect.

Duminy 8

The only man to ever manage to look cool whilst singing a national anthem.

Boucher 7

He would have got less because I disagree with him taking up valuable Older Morkel batting time, but he did a lot of pointing and rolling and at one stage followed Graeme all the way across the field until he gave in and listened to his suggestion.

Morkel the Older 7

They should let him bat a lot earlier than they do. His one over was pretty ordinary, but he's still pleasingly shaped so I can't mark him down.

Trotsky 6

Obviously, Trotsky doesn’t usually get any points on the basis that he once tried to usurp Graeme by being "vice captain". However, he gets some points this time around because he and Roelof clearly have a special slow bowling tag team arrangement where they have to chat about how excellent spin bowlers are at the end of each over. Also, he doesn’t get patted and leapt on when he gets wickets anymore, just the occasional handshake. indian_skimmer and I have decided that it's because he doesn’t like to be touched.

Roelof Van de Merwe 28

I like Roelof, and not just because his name confuses people. He's sturdy and really rather excellent and can’t stop bopping slightly to the music they play at Twenty20. Also totally un-phased by having "Bolton, Bolton, Bolton Wanderers" yelled at him by drunk Indian fans, despite the fact that I can't imagine that makes a lot of sense to a South African.

Morkel the Taller 43

Most of those points are awarded for not bowling any no-balls and for not being Jacques Kallis. However he gets an extra 10 for closing his eyes during the national anthem.

Parnell 7

He would have received a higher score if he hadn’t been 19 years old and prompted the horrifying realisation that in five years time I will not be allowed to think many of the thoughts I currently think about the South African cricket team on the grounds that I could technically be their mother.

Dale 6

Dale's bowling was a little bit wayward but he managed not to kill the five batsmen who suddenly became experts in fast bowling and came over to give him advice, so he deserves at least 5 points for that. He gets an extra one for showing AB his batting with Harbajhan Singh's bat, whilst Harbajahn received physi treatment.



On another note: If you're going to turn up at a cricket match with 8 overs left, quite drunk and then attempt to chat me up, asking a stupid question ("so what brings you here?") and touching my leg repeatedly until I kick you in the ankle is not the way to do it.

Comments

[heatherbelles.livejournal.com]

Did you deliberately time your entry so it was 20:20? Hah.

Also, if it was today, were not a bit wet at Trent Bridge, cos it's been raining most of the day 20 miles up the road here.

Sounds like you had a fun day (appart from the idoit you mentioned...)

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

I didn't deliberately time it, but I'm going to say I did.

BTW, was your brother's email his name at hotmail.com?

[heatherbelles.livejournal.com]

it's his name as the domainname = eg.

itcouldbebloodyanything@littlebrothersname.co.uk

Tell you what, I'll send you a message with it!

[indian-skimmer.livejournal.com]

They didn't show the high five on the BBc highlights. What's the point of a highlights package that doesn't show people failing to high five incredibly tall Morkels?

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

I know! They didn't even get it on the Sky Coverage.

[indian-skimmer.livejournal.com]

And Herschelle and Nella clearly included it in their fielding drills. They'd *practised*.

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

They had. It's attendtion to detail that matters

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

Well, Graeme would do everything if they'd let him.

[sophia-silfaery.livejournal.com]

You were there? We were there!!!

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

Where were you!? We were in a stand of Indian fans (although obviously that's not the most helpful statement)... We could have sat together and formed a more robust section of South African support

[sophia-silfaery.livejournal.com]

We were in Larwood and Voce...I don't think you could escape Indian fans whereever you were. Ours were nice and civil :)

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

ours was the stand with the dugouts on, but Trent Bridge inconsiderately numbered the seats the wrong way around so we weren't behind south africans