Here's an idea:

There's been a lot of talk about how the smaller teams shouldn't be playing the world cup. I have an alternative suggestion: I think we should stop Australia playing in all competitions.

They're always dull and predictable, they make me angry and they get Graeme Smith out (which only Matthew Hoggard should be allowed to do, the rest of the time Graeme should be allowed to do that thing where he stands still, whacks the ball to all parts and turns batting into a form a pornography).

Tournaments would be a whole lot more interesting and enjoyable without Australians.