My week in Bizarreness...(bizarrosity?)

[lemonbella]

So, bizarre week all told.

Bizarre injury to my hand, received whilst attempting to escape from the gym. My hand is totally purple, twice the size and I have to lie about how I did it.

Bizarre experience of panic when it turned out NTL had changed all my TV channels over night! I turned on expecting to find cricketers in formal wear and then wasted ten valuable drunken suit-wearing minutes attempting to find them.

Bizarre illness on Sunday, improved by Monday.

Bizzare argument with woman in Tesco about whether you could kill yourself with cranberry extract tablets. And if so, would two bottles be enough.

Bizarre funeral in which I had to read bible verses in the King James Version, (you try saying "And he saith we know wither thou goest" in front of 400 people), an argument about Geraint Jones (which I was dragged away from before I could make sure I'd won), and some 'friend' of the family who greeted me with the phrase "Ah, yes, you were your Mum's mistake." (Gee, thanks).

Comments

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

It is bizarre!

Add away, Although if I find out you're a terribly offensive person I reserve the right to scowl at you from a distance.

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

That might be best, it has been known to cause me to fly into rages and sometimes cry.

You might want to avoid any posts tagged 'Geraint Jones'. On the grounds that he's England's best wicketkeeper batsman.(*)




(*) Pending return of form(+)
(+) which will happen

[fringedweller.livejournal.com]

How did you injure your hand? And why do you have to lie about it?

Just add that git to my list of people that's going to the wall come the revolution...

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

I was leaping over a turnstile (they'd locked me in the gym!) and executed the move perfectly, except for not swinging my hand into large metal pole and then jamming it in the turnstile mechanism, resulting in yelling (me) and laughing (other people). Do I need to explain why I have to lie about it?

[fringedweller.livejournal.com]

No, I fully understand why you have to lie. I didn't get the escaping the gym thing, but now I do. I'm lucky; should there be an unexpected locking of the door, I can escape into leisure centre's snack bar.

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

grabbing snacks on the way....

[fringedweller.livejournal.com]

It's either a genius or an idiotic use of space and for the life of me I can't figure out which.

[make-a-move.livejournal.com]

I'm guessing the person you were having the argument with over Geraint was a Chris Read fan?

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

Yes. I didn't just pick a random person and berate them; they provoked me.

[indian-skimmer.livejournal.com]

I think berating random people in the street is a lot more likely than we'd like to think...

[lemonbella.livejournal.com]

we've passed the rational, appropriate timing stage, haven't we?

[indian-skimmer.livejournal.com]

Ask yourself how close you are to standing on a street corner with home-printed flyers